RULES FOR A HAPPY MARRIAGE
Rules for a happy marriage are essential. I have been married for almost three years now and we are as happy as the first day we met. I truly believe that I won the lottery with my husband, because he’s doing anything and everything to keep us happy, but even happy marriages need a little bit of a guideline. Here’s what I have learned so far:
- Dialogue : I am a woman that doesn’t like to discuss her issues. Whenever my husband does something that I don’t like, I go into my shell and hope he notices me being upset. But obviously men are not mind readers. So thats why my most important rule is: Communication is the key to a healthy marriage.
- Let it go! I used to dwell on the times when my hubby forgot to pick up more baby formula from the grocery store. Why couldn’t he just remember? But now I learned to forget the little things and keep cool!
- You can’t control your husbands actions: As much as we want to control our husband (LOL), he has a mind of his own. Everybody is responsible for their own destiny. The only person we can completely control, is ourselves.
- Don’t be jealous: I have a girlfriend who constantly thinks that her man is cheating on her. Their relationship is a living hell at this point. Well, you can only let someone throw so many stones at you, before you throw one back. If your partner feels like you assume the worst of him, eventually he might be more inclined to do something indecent. Negativity attracts negativity. Thats why it’s best to trust your husband, until he has truly given you a reason not to.
- Stay pretty: I know our life is much more stressful now that we have kids, but ladies, we can’t give up on ourselves! Looking gorgeous is an expression of self-love and self respect. Trust me, your husband notices this! So, don’t let yourself go!
- Be affectionate: Don’t be the stereotype of a wife that stops having sex after getting married. Everybody needs some love, even your husband (ha ha!). Don’t say no! Even if you’re exhausted, not in the mood, or too busy, please find the time. I think we all can agree, that most of the time…..it doesn’t take very long! 😉
- Compromise: He wants to eat Chinese, you want Sushi. Negotiate for Italian! Compromise is not about losing. It’s a decision that gives your partner the right to be as happy as you are! So always meet each other halfway!
- Acceptance: This is another cliche. As soon as you feel comfortable in the relationship, you start telling him that you hate his mustache, his ugly sport shoes, and that he spends every Saturday with his buddies. Trust me, I get it ladies! But that’s the way you fell in love with him. That’s the man you first met. He will be pissed if you start nagging him like his mother. Believe me, I speak from experience! Pick and choose your battles wisely.
- Don’t bring stress home: This might be the most important rule. What I mean by this, don’t take your stressful day out on your husband. Take a few minutes or however long you need to unwind and chill out, before stepping inside the house. Meditate for 5 minutes in the car, grab a quick cocktail if there is time, take a nice warm bath, basically anything to relax yourself. And after you have calmed down, talk about your stressful day with your husband. The difference is, now you can TALK with him, instead of SCREAM at him. In my opinion, ending the day peacefully, is just as crucial as starting it peacefully.
- Have fun together : We all have our separate lives, and we are very busy. It’s very important not to forget your relationship though. After my husband and I had our daughter, we didn’t have time for each other for at least a couple months after the birth. We started to go a little insane. So we made it mandatory to have one date night a week. This keeps us from going insane. And most importantly, it keeps our life entertaining and romance steaming.
These rules for a happy marriage aren’t guaranteed by any means. But I have been following them for almost 3 years now, and they haven’t failed me yet. The bottom line….don’t take anything too seriously. 🙂