Strategies to get your husband to do what you want
Or: How to get what you want without him noticing.
Do you ever want something, but don’t know how to ask your hubby? Not sure if he’s going to say yes or no? Think before you act. We make calculated and strategic decisions in our business life…. so why not in our love lives?
Sometimes after a couple years of marriage, we forget to use our female power. Not only are we wives and mommies, but very attractive women who are still able to manipulate the hell out of every man. 😉
When your confidence is high and your self-esteem is on fire, you can get anything you want! After all, you got him to marry you, which is easier said than done. Just ask any one of my single girlfriends, it’s a constant battle to find “Mr. Right”…and keep him!
I always turn to my favorite quote from Moby Dick; “ I am the master of my husbands fate, I am the captain of my husbands soul”.
At least that’s how I quote it…:-)
So here are my top 3 strategies to get you way, without your husband ever knowing!
Strategy #1 : Make him think it was his idea
Do you want to get those new Louboutin’s that look so pretty in Saks Fifth Avenue’s window?? But you know it’s not the right time to get them, because Christmas or Hanukkah just ended. First step, don’t ask him to buy the shoes! Make HIM want to buy you the shoes, not the other way around. Make sure there is an event coming up; a dinner party, fundraiser, anything that would require you to wear a dress or something fancy. About a week before the event, casually bring up the fact that you don’t have any shoes to match the dress. Naturally your husband will respond with something like, “ How can that be? You have a closet full of shoes, one of them has to match the dress!” Your response is simple, “Baby, your absolutely right, but these particular shoes are PERFECT! They’re an exact match. But I totally understand where you’re coming from, I’m sure I can find a matching pair somewhere deep in my closet..” Of course, you should be saying all of this with a smile and a sense of humor. The final play is trying on your dress at night, while wearing the “other” shoes. Get his attention, and softly ask, “ Hubby, what do you think, are they a good match for this dress?” Without hesitation, he’ll most likely reply, “Absolutely, they look beautiful!” This is when you go in for the kill! Your last line should be, “ Yeah, they do look nice (with an unexcited look on your face). They’re not perfect, but that’s ok. I’m sure they’ll be fine.”
At this stage ladies, you’ve clearly made your point. The shoes should be on their way! 😉
Strategy #2: Sweet and Innocent
Now, if your hubby is not a “get the hint” kind of guy and you need to be a little more pushy, you should start applying a little psychology. Every man wants to be a hero; he wants to protect you, and be strong for you, it is simple psychology. Choose a romantic night. Make sure you have piece and quiet, he’s not stressed about work, and your baby is not crying in the background. So basically no distractions. Maybe on a date night, when you’re all dressed up, looking super cute, and had a glass of wine or two, you’re in the right moment to strike! You need to make him feel really good about himself. Tell him how sexy you thought it was when he negotiated his last business deal, and how confident he was in his negotiations. How hot he looks in this black sweater. Flirt with him, whatever pushes your hubby’s buttons. When he’s as soft as butter, this is your sweet spot of an opportunity to ask whatever it is you are wanting. Give him your most sweet and innocent eyes and that desperate and irresistible “damsel in distress” voice. You have just transformed this date night to a scene from “Breakfast at Tiffany’s”, and what man can resist Audrey Hepburn!
Strategy # 3: Seduce first, ask after
Well, if strategy #1 and #2 didn’t work for you, you really need to go aggressive this time. To get right to the point, seduce him like Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct! Leave him breathless, speechless, powerless, and floating on a cloud. And don’t forget to let him know he was just as incredible as Michael Douglas! Isn’t every man the happiest man on earth after having sex? They become joyous, happy and free. The world suddenly becomes the most beautiful place. Use those endorphins his body is releasing to your advantage, and ask him then. He won’t have the energy to say no!
Don’t forget ladies, the most important thing to remember is, don’t take anything too seriously. This is not life or death. If you don’t get the new shoes, dress, or car, life goes on. Our goal in marriage is not to manipulate our husbands. In a nutshell, these are exercises to empower ourselves, boost our self-esteem, and keep the relationship hot and heavy. Have fun with it!